Yesterday was the first day of school here at Casa Diva. 4th grade for Miss Lyss, 1st for Jake. She, of course, was beyond thrilled to be going back- school is one of her favorite things on the planet. Where she gets it? No idea! LOL He was reluctant, and after last year, who can really blame him. But, we were positive and encouraging, preparing him for the changes in advance, and we made it into the building with him all smiles.
This year marked the year of Jonas in our house, in the form of backpack, lunchbox, T-shirt, notebooks and jewelry. I admit, I rolled my eyes, but as a protest formed on my lips, memories of a neon orange lunchbox, as well as a hot pink and turquoise backpack flashed before my eyes. I shut my mouth and watched her get that look-you know the one- and had to grin. If she's lucky, she'll grin like that about those boys in 20 years.
Jake went SpongeBob.. again. He's reliable with it, at least-he has had a SpongeBob backpack every single year. But he likes it, and who needs an argument over that? It makes him happy, it makes us happy. And he's always eager to show off the new one. LOL
We got a note today that Jake is in the first grade regular class FULL TIME! That is HUGE, and something I had expected to happen later in the year, or maybe when pigs flew, to be perfectly honest. LOL But it marks a change, in the way he is seen and the attention that is paid. And? Not only is he in the regular class full time, he is in the class with the kids who are further along academically. That proves something to me- what he's capable of really isn't being ignored. Huge, huge steps. Both kids are happy and enjoying school, so far, and are excited about the things they're going to be doing this year. Major bonus, and something to give me a little room to take that deep breath I'm not finding these days.
Everything else... is still everything else. I wish I knew what to think, say, feel... I wish it were different, had been different, in a lot of ways. I always have. But it wasn't, it isn't, and it's very hard for someone like me to wrap my head around things happening as they are. Is it the right thing? Objectively, I can say absolutely. As a mom, a wife, a woman, complete with all those emotions... I honestly don't know. I have a lot of things on my mind, and I don't trust a lot of my feelings, or anyone elses'. No one is 100% selfless. No one in this particular situation is 100% open. And I don't say that with malice, I say that with my own hesitation and an understanding of everyone elses' involved. But I also know that everything happens for a reason, and we are not in control, we are not the ones with the real plans. So, I may not put my trust in anyone else, but I'm laying it at His doorstep and saying, ok. I get it. I've asked for guidance, for signs, and I have to trust what I've gotten back. It really isn't about me. It's about being the person I'm needed to be, for my husband, my children, and the others involved.
Sorry it's been so long, but my head has really been elsewhere lately. Lots happening, lots going to happen, and not much I can say without the veiled crap I have to work with right now. LOL Add to it, the PC crashed and I'm on J's laptop-which i HATE, btw- until further notice. But, I'm going to hang around this time I think. At least for a minute ;)
How was back to school Internet? How's things?
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