Have you ever had one of those moments that changes everything? It doesn't have to be a big moment, or a long moment... but just a split second that shifts stuff around and makes you wonder what you've wasted so much time for? I've been having a lot of those lately.
I've been thinking a lot about my childhood these days, for a lot of reasons, and only remembering the good things. I think that's association right there, but hey, it works for me. My outlook on things has shifted a lot, and I'm... happy. Like, truly happy. Without worrying or stressing, things are just not that huge a deal anymore. I can't say any one thing changed my outlook, but a lot has happened in the last four-five months or so that's all added up to a different me.
It's been a long time since that chick in the mirror looked as peaceful as she has lately. I'm finding pieces of myself I hadn't brought out in years. Pieces no one else brought out in me, either. Maybe pieces no one knew, but me. I'm more fun, I laugh easily. I smile a lot, about a lot of things. I don't feel the weight on my shoulders anymore. I just don't.
I've been doing a lot of letting go, rediscovering, reminiscing, and just being. It's funny how you never notice parts of yourself sliding away until you can just breathe a sigh of relief and just be. And I've figured out how to do that, this just be thing. Be me, with all my quirks and flaws. And love it.
I never thought it would feel this good to just go with it. I forgot how it feels to be truly giddy, or giggly, or have that shining moment where it's all brand new again. I won't forget again. and while i won't forget the negatives, i will no longer let them hold me back. I'm not going to be afraid of who i am, or worry that no one will like the "real" me. I'm who I'm meant to be.. and I should never, ever have thought anything other than that.
So, embrace who you REALLY are. Let your kids see your face light up, show yourself off to everyone you know, and even those you don't. Confidence is stunning- let's all be stunning together.